"So What's It Really Like?"

Late one night, I took Gus the Dog out for his pre-bedtime bathroom break. I lingered outside the Q long enough to savor one of the last genuinely warm Vermont nights and was approached by a student who I’d only met in passing on move-in day.


He said, “So do you care if I ask you something that’s kind of personal? I mean, what’s it really like living here with your family around all of us?”

I thought for a moment. I suppose I could have told me about the guys next door and their rave’s worth of DJ equipment, the girl I found sleeping in the hallway using her purse as a pillow and the time someone on the fourth floor launched a water balloon at my wife and painted a cringe-worthy picture of what it’s like to be a college professor living in what’s more or less a dorm.

But that would not have been accurate. And it would have been a total cliché. If I were to complain to Owen about loud music and run of the mill harmless debauchery, it would be like someone going to the grocery store at the busiest time of the day and being upset there’s a line. We knew what we signed up for.

The thing that’s harder to see and sometimes hard to articulate is the quality of life value that’s added when given the chance to be around a group of people seeing the world with fresh eyes. Everything’s new to a college freshman- being away from home for the first time, being exposed to new ideas, learning to think for themselves, etc. To a large extent, the Kelly’s really aren’t all that different. Everything is new to us as well. We’re new to Vermont, facing new roles domestically and just trying to figure things out the best we can.

Living around people who are in a similar transitional stage makes for a more engaging set of neighbors than living around people who think they have everything figured out. Speaking of clichés, one of the most visible ones in teaching is “I learn just as much from my students as they learn from me.” Occasionally, I’ve found this to be true, but more often than not it’s a pretty statement that’s evidence of a false sense of humility.

My sense is that, like most clichés, however lame they are on the surface, they can possess some great truths. This year might be one of those times.